machshefa | Appreciation and community

Hello, lovely and talented f-list.

*flist glances down: OMG, she's rambling again! We either get announcements, or rambling...

Yes, indeed.

It's been an interesting year. When I first found the fandom, I was a lurker extraordinaire. I read voraciously -- anything SSHG, and sometimes I even reviewed. Even from the start, I was struck by the intelligence and thoughtfulness of the readership (not to mention the brilliance of much of the writing) and was intimidated enough by all of that to think twice before posting my own thoughts in a review.

Doubly so once I found and opened a LJ. LJ was the place where I could more easily ~~stalk~~, keep track of my favorite writers and their stories. The level of discourse captured me, but either because RL had already tapped me out, or because I didn't think that I had much to add to discussion, I was largely silent. I never ever thought that I would actively participate, and if you would have told me that I would be writing HP fanfiction, I would have laughed.

Yes, yes, if you knew me in RL, you would laugh at the notion that I could keep my mouth shut for that long (which, indeed, I didn't!), but this was not my community. I was not a writer, and I was not an analyzer of fiction. I was just a rabid fangirl. I'd been very active in an online community and found it marvelous and life-changing, so I understood that it could be so -- but I just didn't consideer what a community of fans and writers would be like.

I'm having more fun, and feeling more connected in many ways to you, lovely flist, than I have in quite a while. Yes, of course, I have some lovely RL relationships that I treasure and have fun in RL. But participating in this community has been amazing -- not least because of how much I am learning here, and how much I am enjoying all of you. Not just your writing. You.

And can I just say, setting up

portus_envy did wonders for my reflexive avoidance to posting to LJ. Not that I'm totally caught up on all the fics, ficlets and drabbles, mind you (ok, barely caught up at all -- and there is so much really good stuff there that I've yet to read!). Also, more writing from me came out of that community -- which was a surprise. It's been a good exercise for me, and I hope that those few of you who are following it are enjoying the unfolding saga of Transported. When it's not making me want to pull my hair out, I'm enjoying it, too. (It was insisting that it was not a drabble series, but rather, a dribble series, earlier this week. It has since been persuaded, otherwise.)

So this week, as the appreciation meme's are cycling, I have been quite astonished and delighted. Not only could I name at least ten of you guys (if not more) who make me smile, who will reach out a hand through cyberspace for support and encouragement, who will let me into your lives to support and encourage, who thrill me with your writing and with your encouragement and reviews of mine -- but wonder of wonders, my name is showing up on some of your lists. *Pauses to recover from delighted surprise...

So, to combine meme's, I will say that there are many of you here who make my world a better place. To those who will talk with me about HP canon and fanfic until deep into the night (RL friends sort of look blank or roll their eyes). To those who glare at me when I wibble about my writing ('Why am I doing this when she *points* is doing it so much better?') and who kick my butt when it is in need of kicking. To those who genuinely squee and tell me what they felt touched by in something I've written. To those who poke their heads in through cyberspace with my gchat status message indicates that there is, possibly, a nuclear disaster looming on my side of the screen (rare, but true. ~~Hides flaming sword from Annie who would take it away from me~~...). To OWL, where I really began to become integrated into the fandom -- and whose staff are the most marvelous, funny, talented, reflective, intelligent women I've been privileged to meet.

I shall be at Terminus. I wish I could have been at Portus (though

portus_envy was great -- exhausting -- fun). I am so excited to meet those of you who shall be there, face-to-face. Because, as I remind those of my friends in RL who know about my fandom community -- You guys are not imaginary friends -- you're real people :D And I adore you. *hugs.

So, who else is coming to Terminus?