Your post is wonderful. When the time is right, maybe remind T to hear the emotion behind the words, and not the words spoken. As you well know, people say the things they would find comforting themselves, but they might not be the words we ourselves find comforting. I learned that if I listen more to the feelings than the words, I didn't waste energy being angry that someone could say something like that.
Thanks for reminding us that we shouldn't always point out the silver linings. Sometimes, when dealing with tragic situations, we try to make the hurt go away when instead we just need to give a hug. Sometimes I had to remind people that I just needed to feel my bad feelings and not to help me feel better. Just hug and support me.
That said, I'm grateful that T has been surrounded by so much love and support. I don't know her, but knowing there are so many people to care is a wonderful gift.
no subject
Your post is wonderful. When the time is right, maybe remind T to hear the emotion behind the words, and not the words spoken. As you well know, people say the things they would find comforting themselves, but they might not be the words we ourselves find comforting. I learned that if I listen more to the feelings than the words, I didn't waste energy being angry that someone could say something like that.
Thanks for reminding us that we shouldn't always point out the silver linings. Sometimes, when dealing with tragic situations, we try to make the hurt go away when instead we just need to give a hug. Sometimes I had to remind people that I just needed to feel my bad feelings and not to help me feel better. Just hug and support me.
That said, I'm grateful that T has been surrounded by so much love and support. I don't know her, but knowing there are so many people to care is a wonderful gift.